Mr. Right must have the following: ………………………..

Motivational speakers, inspirational speakers, and just people in general speak about women’s list of qualifications. Most express that the list that women have for men are too extensive, they desire standards that they are barely meeting themselves.

However, my problem? My former list for Mr. Right included nothing. Now, on the surface, I would say things like: “Oh, I will give any guy a chance as long as I know his heart”, “I don’t have a list because God may bring me someone who won’t meet any standard on my list”, “I don’t discriminate”…

Lies. Lies. Lies. Want to know the truth? I didn’t think I deserved a list. There was nothing there because I didn’t believe that I was worthy of anyone.

My list of nothing-ness was just as bad as those whose lists for Mr. Right included everything underneath the sun.

But GOD!

Once free from low self-esteem and major insecurities (I’m a work in progress), God revealed to me who I am. He revealed to me that I was altogether lovely and created in His image. He showed me that I was worthy of loving, worthy of commitment, worthy of marriage.

We must have standards, it is vital to have standards. We cannot entertain any-ole-body. Any-ole-body cannot have access to our spirits, our hearts, and our minds. We must guard our hearts from any-ole-body, it is easily penetrated and influenced.

Set the standard, become the standard: if he has to have a credit score of 697, so should you; if he has to have a six-pack, where is yours? if he must be childless, so should you…and the list goes on.

I have my list now; it is simple yet sets a standard for the next man that I will date. No longer am I willing to compromise myself, no longer am I willing to deal with someone I know is not right for me because I neglected to have a standard at all, no longer am I willing to settle.

I thank God that I finally know what I want and understand that I am worthy of love, I am worthy of a relationship, I am worthy of marriage…

I pray you understand your worth as well…

Peace and Blessings

Do you know Tanya?

No, who is that?

You know Tanya! Short, dark skin, the (fat, heavy-set, chubby, big) one…

Oooooo yeah, I know her…

I wish I could say that I imagine that is how the conversation goes when someone is trying to identify me…but I KNOW that is how the conversation goes. I must admit, it bothered me terribly hearing that. 

That’s an easy problem to rectify right? Don’t want to be identified as the chubby one? Lose weight and feel great!

Does the gym, trail, exercise video erase low self-esteem? Will the numbers on the scale erase the years of being insecure? If that is the case, why do we see so many young ladies suffer from bulimia and anorexia? Why do we see so many young ladies doing whatever it takes to look like Beyonce, Taylor Swift, or Rihanna?

It was more than me being defined by my height, skin color, and weight. When I heard those words, it went beyond just being bothered…it confirmed for me that I was undesirable and that I would always be the short, dark, and chubby girl…It reminded me that I would always be rejected. It reminded me that I would be nothing more than just a number. It told me that I was unlovable because I was the chubby one.

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.” Romans 12:2

Weight loss is wonderful, especially for your health, however, if you are looking for weight loss to erase low self-esteem and self-hate, you must go a little deeper. The mind is where the transform begins. As you are healing the outside, be sure that the inside is being taken care of as well. 

Transform your mind by renewing it with the Word of God, connecting with encouraging people, and removing the negativity from your life.

It profits you nothing to get your body intact but still unable to love who you are. God did not make a mistake when He created you. You are beautifully and wonderfully made.

It is a process, but I am learning to love my height, my chocolate complexion, and my MANY curves. God has and continues to mend those insecurities. He reminded me that I am created in His image and He alone defines who I am.

And He can do the same for you…

As the inner man is being transformed, the outer man will be as well. March 1, 2014…follow my health and wealth journey.

Peace and Blessings